by Max Barry

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Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3,230thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3,332ndLowest Overall Tax Burden: 5,896th
The Dirty but Lucrative Affairs of
Capitalist Paradise
Everything has its price...
Mr Happy
WA Delegate / The Embassy's Complaints Office
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Very Good

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

A Goblinoid Merchant

Population10.258 billion

CapitalMr Happy's Funland
LeaderMr Happy


The Dirty but Lucrative Affairs of A Goblinoid Merchant is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Mr Happy with an even hand, and notable for its compulsory military service, irreverence towards religion, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 10.258 billion Goblinoid Merchants are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The tiny, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mr Happy's Funland. The average income tax rate is 5.1%.

The powerhouse Goblinoid economy, worth 849 trillion GOLDS a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is 82,844 GOLDS, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.5 times as much as the poorest.

The national sporting identity is represented by a talking burger and a singing smartphone, employees are told they can avoid traffic jams by starting work at 4 AM, the Grasshopper stadiums are open 24/7, and an increasing percentage of the population's youth have homosexual parents. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. A Goblinoid Merchant's national animal is the Grasshopper, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is CONSUM.

A Goblinoid Merchant is ranked 143,843rd in the world and 10th in The Embassy for Most Advanced Law Enforcement, scoring 1,148.95 on the Orwell Orderliness Index.

Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3,230thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3,332ndLowest Overall Tax Burden: 5,896thHighest Disposable Incomes: 10,787thLargest Mining Sector: 11,753rdTop
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 12,757thLargest Gambling Industry: 14,325thFattest Citizens: 15,295thLargest Retail Industry: 16,057thHighest Drug Use: 17,887thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 18,860thMost Stationary: 19,864thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 21,464thHighest Economic Output: 22,370th
Most Influential: 1st in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1st in the regionMost Stationary: 1st in the regionHighest Drug Use: 1st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 2 » Catherine Louise Marie Ernestine Freneau and Lower Slobbovia.

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