Population | 31.093 billion |
Leader | primus inter pares |
Faith | there are no gods |
Currency | needless |
Animal | homo sapiens |
The Free Lands of Coffin-Breathe is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by primus inter pares with an even hand, and remarkable for its national health service, smutty television, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 31.093 billion Coffin-Breathren are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.
The enormous, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, although Administration, Environment, and Welfare are also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense receive no funds. The income tax rate is 100%.
The frighteningly efficient Coffin-Breathish economy, worth a remarkable 8,050 trillion needlesses a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 258,914 needlesses, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.
Group hugs break out during floor votes, even God cannot save you in Coffin-Breathe, concussed homo sapiensball players cannot remember their lineup position, and kids' party bags often contain candy and e-cigarettes. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Coffin-Breathe's national animal is the homo sapiens, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is there are no gods.
Coffin-Breathe is ranked 13,737th in the world and 1st in Greifenreservat for Most Stationary, with 1,877.59048584132 days.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, kids' party bags often contain candy and e-cigarettes.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, concussed homo sapiensball players cannot remember their lineup position.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, even God cannot save you in Coffin-Breathe.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, group hugs break out during floor votes.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, Scoutmasters debate whether luxury log cabins defeat the purpose of camping.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, party affiliation is just as irrelevant as campaign promises.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, a suspicious number of male students have joined the Ladies' Wrestling League.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, animal liberationists receive government funding to break into animal research labs.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, flu research is commonly shut down for fear of creating a superbug.
- : Following new legislation in Coffin-Breathe, 100-year-old politicians are now a thing of the past.