The United States of Crapolica is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Meow East with an even hand, and remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, sprawling nuclear power plants, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate, humorless population of 46.363 billion Crapolicans are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Crapolica Central. The average income tax rate is 48.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Crapolican economy, worth an astonishing 10,748 trillion yungrams a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Gambling. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 231,835 yungrams, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.0 times as much as the poorest.

Welfare recipients are milking the government for all they've got, state media insists that Meow East is the most fashionable leader in The AGS Commonwealth, no one knows how to tie a reef knot, and spoiler warnings are now given out before political speeches. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crapolica's national animal is the dapan, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Cowardism.

Crapolica is ranked 2,718^th in the world and 1^st in The AGS Commonwealth for Most Beautiful Environments, with 3,172.22 pounds of wildlife per square mile.