by Max Barry

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Highest Poor Incomes: 1stMost Scientifically Advanced: 1stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2nd
The Despotic Dictatorship of
Corrupt Dictatorship
God was a dream of good government.
The Despot
Influence
Dealmaker
Founder
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Despoticania

Population30.871 billion

CapitalDespoticania Prime
LeaderThe Despot
FaithChurch of Transcendental Hatred

CurrencyDespollar
AnimalWinged Unicorn Pig

The Despotic Dictatorship of Despoticania is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by The Despot with an iron fist, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, frequent executions, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 30.871 billion Despoticanians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The relatively small, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Despoticania Prime. The average income tax rate is 98.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Despoticanian economy, worth an astonishing 32,957 trillion Despollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Automobile Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 1,067,594 Despollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The 'kind of scrawny' 500 meter hurdle is a popular event, people talk about things being better when men were men, the government has stated an intention to min-max its stats for 'teh pwnage', and the military has forsaken terrestrial warfare. Crime is totally unknown. Despoticania's national animal is the Winged Unicorn Pig, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Church of Transcendental Hatred.

Despoticania is ranked 8,879th in the world and 21st in The Alliance of Dictators for Most Authoritarian, with 4,723.14 milliStalins.

Top
1%
Highest Poor Incomes: 1stMost Scientifically Advanced: 1stLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3rdLargest Information Technology Sector: 3rdLargest Black Market: 4thHighest Average Incomes: 6thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 9thMost Efficient Economies: 10thHighest Economic Output: 11thSmartest Citizens: 13thMost Subsidized Industry: 19thMost Advanced Public Education: 28thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 37thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 41stMost Cultured: 43rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 47thMost Secular: 65thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 78thLargest Retail Industry: 97thLargest Agricultural Sector: 108thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 128thLargest Mining Sector: 154thMost Corrupt Governments: 163rdLargest Governments: 176thMost Armed: 225thMost Developed: 253rdLongest Average Lifespans: 283rdLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 287thMost Stationary: 378thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 492ndLowest Crime Rates: 525thLargest Publishing Industry: 865thMost Avoided: 1,154thMost Rebellious Youth: 1,359thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,530thLargest Populations: 1,946thHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,986thTop
5%
Most Influential: 2,688thHealthiest Citizens: 2,957thMost Valuable International Artwork: 5,440thRudest Citizens: 5,621stMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 6,036thMost Authoritarian: 8,879thTop
10%
Most Advanced Public Transport: 11,730thMost Income Equality: 11,741stLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 17,103rdMost Inclusive: 17,114thLargest Welfare Programs: 17,401stMost World Assembly Endorsements: 17,835th
Top
1%
Most Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 1st in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 1st in the regionSmartest Citizens: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionMost Stationary: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 1st in the regionMost Cultured: 1st in the regionTop
5%
Largest Retail Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Armed: 2nd in the regionMost Influential: 2nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 2nd in the regionMost Secular: 2nd in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 3rd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Developed: 3rd in the regionMost Income Equality: 3rd in the regionLargest Governments: 3rd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Populations: 5th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 5th in the regionTop
10%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 7th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 7th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 8th in the regionMost Inclusive: 9th in the regionRudest Citizens: 10th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 10th in the regionMost Avoided: 11th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 12th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, the military has forsaken terrestrial warfare.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, the government has stated an intention to min-max its stats for 'teh pwnage'.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, people talk about things being better when men were men.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, the 'kind of scrawny' 500 meter hurdle is a popular event.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, hockey players who drop their gloves discard them on abandoned baseball mitts.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, onions have been banned due to their tendency to cause eye irritation.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, five-year-olds who refuse to line up on command get gold stars.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, families returning from international vacations are unable to get their children back into the country.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, major cities shut down as their local sports team takes to the field every day.
  • : Following new legislation in Despoticania, frequent fliers are obliged to submit to invasive security procedures by government security.

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