by Max Barry

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The Benevolent Queendom of
Democratic Socialists

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

1

The Benevolent Queendom of Divine Cervine History - 2015 July - December

The Benevolent Queendom of Divine Cervine History
2015

July - December

_____

July 1st, 2015

    • The number of students attending university has reached a record high.

July 2nd, 2015

    • Leather-clad individuals can be seen walking their slaves in public parks.
    • The "Underwear of Women in Power" issue of The Divine Cervine City Times is sold out.

July 3rd, 2015

    • Welfare funding has recently gone through the roof.

July 4th, 2015

    • A ban on unsolicited cold calling in all forms is in effect.
    • The nation is experiencing a severe shortage of sporting events.

July 5th, 2015

    • Children are brainwashed at a young age to accept "Love and peace!" as a way of life.

July 6th, 2015

    • Postmen have been arrested in job lots for selling junk mail as home insulation.
    • Heavy industry must go to expensive lengths to dispose of waste.

July 8th, 2015

    • Fairy deer is one of the most popular forenames in Divine Cervine. #258

July 9th, 2015

    • Citizens applying for their first jobs face fierce competition from the homeless.
    • Badminton was recently banned due to 'unacceptable violence' inherent to the game.

July 10th, 2015

    • Prime commercial land is being swamped with archaeological teams.

July 11th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine has designated Divine Cervine City as its capital city.

July 12th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Most Compassionate Citizens. Divine Cervine is ranked 234th in Lazarus for Most Compassionate Citizens, scoring 47 on the Kitten Softness Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Compassionate Citizens (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 5,833rd in the world for Most Compassionate Citizens, scoring 47 on the Kitten Softness Rating.
    • Divine Cervine changed its national capital to "The Enchanted Wildwood of Sacred Fauna".
    • Politicians constantly ring their voters to remind them how good a job they're doing.
    • Wind farms are erected on shuttered oil platforms.
    • Flash floods that dams could have controlled regularly ravage small towns in mountain valleys.

July 13th, 2015

    • Untold millions of luminous orbs are going into a new government-funded maternity leave scheme.
    • The government tries to improve relations with hostile countries by sending gift baskets.

July 14th, 2015

    • The government is using tax revenues to provide jobs for the poor.
    • Shelters struggle to keep up with the endless intake of stray animals. #431

July 15th, 2015

    • The arms industry has been shut down in a surge of pacifism.
    • Elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume.

July 16th, 2015

    • The wearing and manufacture of fur apparel is banned.
    • Nude art is becoming wildly popular.

July 17th, 2015

    • Anti-government web sites are springing up.
    • Protests are legal but strictly supervised.

July 18th, 2015

    • Anyone who so much as frowns is referred to a mental health unit.
    • Businesses are forced to bring all work back within the nation's borders.

July 19th, 2015

    • Conductors wield diamond-encrusted batons to fit in with their freshly gilded surroundings.

July 20th, 2015

    • Programmes of questionable content are shown at peak-hours.

July 21st, 2015

    • All beauty contests have been banned.
    • There has been a rapid increase of noise complaints over the sound of buzzing bees.

July 22nd, 2015

    • The government funds large training centres to turn fairy deer into functioning members of society.
    • The nation is constantly threatened with invasion but at least homosexuality in the military isn't a problem.

July 23rd, 2015

    • Students cut up leftover luminous orbs during Arts and Crafts.

July 24th, 2015

    • Long arduous trials are held for the most trivial of offences.

July 26th, 2015

    • Every citizen must submit to DNA testing to be eliminated from police inquiries.
    • Any citizen who cries is immediately assigned a psychiatrist.

July 27th

    • The number of students attending university has reached a record high.

July 28th, 2015

    • Anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper.
    • The nation is currently revamping its entire education system.

July 29th, 2015

    • Organised sports are frowned upon as frivolous.
    • Crowds of flag-burning protesters tend to accidentally become crowds of burning protesters.

July 30th, 2015

    • Artists are pillars of society.
    • Companies struggle to cover for the hordes of employees on parental leave.

July 31st, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Most Pacifist. Divine Cervine is ranked 148th in Lazarus for Most Pacifist, scoring 406 on the Lennon-Springsteen Scale.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Pacifist. Divine Cervine is ranked 3,051st in the world for Most Pacifist, scoring 406 on the Lennon-Springsteen Scale.
    • Phone taps are frequently carried out by the police. #150
    _
    _

_____

August 1st, 2015

    • Most of the nation's wealthy aristocrats are dentists.
    • Droves of former desperados are applying to join the border police.

August 2nd, 2015

    • Extreme political groups are outlawed.
    • People take government jobs for the frequent flier miles.

August 3rd, 2015

    • People reciting Shakespeare have become a common sight.
    • There's a shortage of swinging hot spots as land development grinds to a halt.

August 4th, 2015

    • Consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed.
    • Schools have extensive counseling programs for troubled students.

August 5th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Largest Welfare Programs. Divine Cervine is ranked 173rd in Lazarus for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 110 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Welfare Programs (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 4,458th in the world for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 110 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.
    • Organ donation is compulsory.
    • Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity. #303

August 6th, 2015

    • Public footpaths are being slowly eroded by the burgeoning number of ramblers.
    • There has been a series of riots between local cannibals and health food advocates.

August 7th, 2015

    • Vaccinations are mandatory.
    • Pro-democracy regime change has been avoided.

August 8th, 2015

    • The breathalyser pledge is a traditional part of marriages in Divine Cervine.
    • The government is giving peace a chance.

August 9th, 2015

    • The government is promoting multicultural values with the new 'Just Be Nice, OK?' initiative.
    • Children are raised bilingual from an early age.

August 10th, 2015

    • Noises louder than a whisper have been prohibited by law.
    • All forms of advertising are banned.

August 11th, 2015

    • The nation has welcomed its expats back with open arms.
    • Citizens are allowed to rise or fall based on their own merits.

August 12th, 2015

    • The government seeks peaceful forum with terrorists.
    • Tax-payers are funding ever more extravagant movie projects. #440

August 13th, 2015

    • Corporations are forbidden from employing outside the nation.
    • Sex changes are routinely performed at Divine Cervine's hospitals.

August 14th, 2015

    • Welfare funding has recently gone through the roof.

August 15th, 2015

    • Birth rates have hit an all-time low.
    • The study of medicine is popular throughout Divine Cervine.

August 16th, 2015

    • The airship business has been driven out of the country by strict regulations and high fines.
    • The government is ignoring the latest terrorist atrocities in The Enchanted Wildwood of Sacred Fauna for fear of causing a fuss.

August 17th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine's soft-touch approach to diplomacy has made it known as the 'push-over' of the region.
    • Pharmacies close down as medicinal drugs are sold freely by the government.

August 18th, 2015

    • Betting pennies on games of Go Fish is considered deviant.
    • The nation's official head of religious affairs is an atheist.

August 19th, 2015

    • Illegal hunting is rife after veganism was recently made compulsory.

August 21st, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Happiest Citizens. Divine Cervine is ranked 412th in Lazarus and 9,673rd in the world for Happiest Citizens, scoring 11 on the Relative Cheerfulness Rating.
    • Invading armies are given hard glares for their cheek.
    • Mothers are routinely abandoning their children in the name of women's rights.

August 22nd, 2015

    • Graffiti graces every city's streets.

August 23rd, 2015

    • Citizens are frequently searched for illegal weapons.
    • Schools have extensive counseling programs for troubled students.
    • There is a dearth of space for new houses.

August 24th, 2015

    • The nation is ravaged by daily union strikes.
    • Mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest growing field.

August 25th, 2015

    • Eminent domain has been abolished.
    • All major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras.

August 26th, 2015

    • A ban on unsolicited cold calling in all forms is in effect.

August 27th, 2015

    • Prime real estate is devoted to wind farms and solar energy generators.
    • Organ donation is compulsory.

August 28th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Highest Average Tax Rates. Divine Cervine is ranked 592nd in Lazarus and 12,869th in the world for Highest Average Tax Rates, scoring 15 on the Inverse Hayek Index.
    • Children as young as six shock their parents by coming out of the closet.

August 29th, 2015

    • Most citizens in Divine Cervine are abject pyrophobes after extremely graphic pamphlets were mailed nationwide by the government.
    • Badminton was recently banned due to 'unacceptable violence' inherent to the game.

August 30th, 2015

    • Politicians are often found scavenging bins at night to supplement their income.
    • Schoolchildren have twice-weekly sex education classes.

August 31st, 2015


_____

September 1st, 2015

    • Same-sex marriages are increasingly common.
    • Public footpaths are being slowly eroded by the burgeoning number of ramblers.

September 2nd, 2015

    • Divine Cervine's children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region.
    • Heavy industry must go to expensive lengths to dispose of waste.

September 3rd, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Happiest Citizens. Divine Cervine is ranked 266th in Lazarus for Happiest Citizens, scoring 11 on the Relative Cheerfulness Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Happiest Citizens (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 6,280th in the world for Happiest Citizens, scoring 11 on the Relative Cheerfulness Rating.
    • The latest Harry Potter book is a bestseller.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise".
    • The mining industry has taken a hit from tighter environmental regulations.

September 4th, 2015

    • Fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise" to "Democratic Socialists".
    • People faint regularly as they get stuck with compulsory vaccinations.

September 5th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine is notorious for its citizens' infidelity.
    • The government has adopted a "Lightning Never Strikes Twice" approach to dealing with natural disasters.

September 6th, 2015

    • Military funding has been stripped back.
    • National parks have long lines of different gender-specific 'Porta-Pottys'.

September 7th, 2015

    • Students are wary of colorfully decorated new teachers with names like Professor Pipsqueak.
    • Organised sports are frowned upon as frivolous.

September 8th, 2015

    • Tourists from around the world come to visit the country's famous rainforests.

September 9th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Healthiest Citizens. Divine Cervine is ranked 494th in Lazarus and 10,662nd in the world for Healthiest Citizens, with 10 Standard Bananas Ingested per capita per day.
    • High-income earners pay a 100% tax rate. #018

September 10th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine's free colleges struggle to maintain standards in the face of overwhelming demand.

September 11th, 2015

    • Consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed.

September 12th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Dedicated Public Healthcare. Divine Cervine is ranked 584th in Lazarus and 12,593rd in the world for Most Dedicated Public Healthcare, scoring 74 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.
    • The upper class have been throwing riots after hunting was recently banned.
    • Breast milk is being redistributed from each according to their ability to each according to their need.

September 13th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Best Weather. Divine Cervine is ranked 497th in Lazarus and 9,855th in the world for Best Weather, with 56 Metres of Sunlight Above Expected.
    • Every citizen must submit to DNA testing to be eliminated from police inquiries.

September 14th, 2015

    • The government awards prizes to television shows featuring stereotype-breaking minority roles.

September 15th, 2015

    • Leather-clad individuals can be seen walking their slaves in public parks.
    • Public intoxication has decreased ever since fraternities were banned.

September 16th, 2015

    • Companies struggle to cover for the hordes of employees on parental leave.

September 17th, 2015

    • The government pours millions of luminous orbs into rehabilitation programs annually.

September 18th, 2015

    • Students are known to arrive at school in their pyjamas.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise".

September 19th, 2015

    • Wind farms are erected on shuttered oil platforms.
    • A government program is underway to revitalize Divine Cervine's beaches. #031

September 20th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine has one of the largest offshore wind farms in the world.

September 21st, 2015

    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Longest Average Lifespans. Divine Cervine is ranked 517th in Lazarus and 10,514th in the world for Longest Average Lifespans, scoring 29 on the Enoch Index.
    • Breast milk is being redistributed from each according to their ability to each according to their need.
    • The government is notorious for leaving citizens with almost nothing from their inheritance.

September 22nd, 2015

    • The nation is currently revamping its entire education system.
    • Reporters often lose their jobs over fact-checking errors.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise" to "Democratic Socialists".

September 23rd, 2015

    • The "Underwear of Women in Power" issue of The The Enchanted Wildwood of Sacred Fauna Times is sold out.
    • Tax evaders are regularly visited by agents of the Divine Cervine Blood Tithe.

September 24th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Rebellious Youth. Divine Cervine is ranked 576th in Lazarus and 11,044th in the world for Most Rebellious Youth, scoring 10 on the Stark-Dean Displacement Index.
    • Space shuttles regularly launch rubbish into space.
    • Aeroplanes have been converted into housing units after all air travel was outlawed.

September 25th, 2015

    • It is illegal to make racist remarks in public.
    • Consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed.

September 26th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Most Beautiful Environments. Divine Cervine is ranked 399th in Lazarus for Most Beautiful Environments, with 507.4 Pounds of Wildlife less Pounds of Concrete per square mile.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Beautiful Environments. Divine Cervine is ranked 7,716th in the world for Most Beautiful Environments, with 507.4 Pounds of Wildlife less Pounds of Concrete per square mile.
    • Parents live in fear of governmental 'child protection' squads. #148
    • Politicians constantly ring their voters to remind them how good a job they're doing.
    _

September 27th, 2015


September 28th, 2015

    • The nation has opened its arms to an influx of refugees.
    • Divine Cervine is notorious for its citizens' infidelity.

September 29th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Most Income Equality. Divine Cervine is ranked 79th in Lazarus for Most Income Equality, scoring 189 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Income Equality. Divine Cervine is ranked 4,230th in the world for Most Income Equality, scoring 189 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.
    • An increasing percentage of the population's youth have homosexual parents.
    • Libraries are now installed with jacuzzis and mini-bars.
    _

September 30th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Most Inclusive (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 161st in Lazarus and 3,585th in the world for Most Inclusive, scoring 184 on the Mandela-Wollstonecraft Non-Discrimination Index.
    • Any citizen who cries is immediately assigned a psychiatrist.
    • Divine Cervine's free colleges struggle to maintain standards in the face of overwhelming demand.

_____

October 1st, 2015

    • The number of students attending university has reached a record high.
    • The nation has welcomed its expats back with open arms.

October 2nd, 2015

    • Divine Cervine changed its national nation type to "Benevolent Queendom".
    • Heavy industry must go to expensive lengths to dispose of waste.

October 4th, 2015

    • The Divine Cervinean Babysitters Club has proven to be a huge relief to stressed-out parents across the nation.
    • 'The Anti-Government Hour' is a popular programme on many of Divine Cervine's radio stations.
    • Citizens wishing to leave the country must surrender half their wealth to the government.
    • Elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume.

October 5th, 2015

    • Drills and shovels have been banned as the government cracks down on any means of fracking.

October 6th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 96th in Lazarus and 2,001st in the world for Most Pacifist, scoring 609 on the Lennon-Springsteen Scale.
    • Queen Arbeaone has just been declared ruler of Divine Cervine in an international press conference.
    • Divine Cervine changed its national leader to "Queen Arbeaone".
    _
    _

October 7th, 2015

    • Citizens are expected to be proficient in at least five languages. #115
    • The government is ignoring the latest terrorist atrocities in The Enchanted Wildwood of Sacred Fauna for fear of causing a fuss.

October 8th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 93rd in Lazarus and 1,987th in the world for Most Pacifist, scoring 612 on the Lennon-Springsteen Scale.
    • Teenagers across the country are celebrating the defeat of a national curfew bill.
    _
    _
    _

October 9th, 2015

    • Citizens can be frequently spotted going about their business stark naked.
    • Droves of former desperados are applying to join the border police.

October 10th, 2015

    • The space program has been scrapped in order to focus on more terrestrial pursuits.
    • Students in Divine Cervine's schools rarely attend their classes.

October 11th, 2015

    • The newspaper industry is subsidised by the government in order to keep it afloat. #269
    • The government keeps introducing new foreign species to combat the previous ones it has introduced.
    • Photographers have to apply for a license to photograph Queen Arbeaone. #277

October 12th, 2015

    • Phone taps are frequently carried out by the police. #150
    • Consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed.

October 13th, 2015

    • Postmen have been arrested in job lots for selling junk mail as home insulation.
    • The nation has an international reputation for compassion. #036

October 14th, 2015

    • A primitive society is being eroded as its youth flock to the modern world.
    • The breathalyser pledge is a traditional part of marriages in Divine Cervine.

October 15th, 2015

    • All major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras.
    • The nation's only university is the School of Hard Knocks.

October 16th, 2015

    • Children are brainwashed at a young age to accept "Love and peace!" as a way of life.
    • Prime real estate is devoted to wind farms and solar energy generators.

October 17th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Best Weather. Divine Cervine is ranked 412th in Lazarus and 7,626th in the world for Best Weather, with 70 Metres of Sunlight Above Expected.
    • The government seeks peaceful forum with terrorists.
    • Public footpaths are being slowly eroded by the burgeoning number of ramblers.
    _
    _

October 19th, 2015

    • The wearing and manufacture of fur apparel is banned.
    • Anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper.

October 20th, 2015

    • All beauty contests have been banned.
    • Refugees from other nations are flocking to Divine Cervine's border. #047

October 21st, 2015

    • The government is promoting multicultural values with the new 'Just Be Nice, OK?' initiative.

October 22nd, 2015

    • Heavy industry must go to expensive lengths to dispose of waste.
    • The government is notorious for leaving citizens with almost nothing from their inheritance.
    • Workers have seized control of the economy.
    • Sections of the police receive paramilitary training.

October 23rd, 2015


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 77th in Lazarus and 1,796th in the world for Most Pacifist, scoring 663 on the Lennon-Springsteen Scale.
    • A well-funded social safety net protects the unfortunate.
    _
    _
    _

October 24th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Most Compassionate Citizens (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 93rd in Lazarus and 2,144th in the world for Most Compassionate Citizens, scoring 107 on the Kitten Softness Rating.
    • Betting pennies on games of Go Fish is considered deviant.
    • The new national mascot has to be wheeled onto the field of play. #385
    _

October 25th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 86th in Lazarus and 3,793rd in the world for Most Income Equality, scoring 187 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.
    • 'The Anti-Government Hour' is a popular programme on many of Divine Cervine's radio stations.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Liberal Democratic Socialists".
    • Tax-payers are funding ever more extravagant movie projects. #440
    _

October 26th, 2015

    • The government pours millions of luminous orbs into rehabilitation programs annually.
    • The words 'private' and 'enterprise' must never appear in the same sentence.

October 27th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine fell out of the regional Top 10% for Best Weather.
    • Divine Cervine is ranked 463rd in Lazarus and 8,460th in the world for Best Weather, with 65 Metres of Sunlight Above Expected.
    • There has been a series of riots between local cannibals and health food advocates.
    • Space shuttles regularly launch rubbish into space.

October 28th, 2015

    • Discarded pennies litter the streets.
    • Protests are legal but strictly supervised.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Liberal Democratic Socialists" to "Democratic Socialists".

October 29th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Healthiest Citizens. Divine Cervine is ranked 338th in Lazarus and 7,139th in the world for Healthiest Citizens, with 12 Standard Bananas Ingested per capita per day.
    • Queen Arbeaone's mistress is the belle at many state balls.
    • Politicians are often found scavenging bins at night to supplement their income.
    _

October 30th, 2015

    • A zombie apocalypse has befallen upon the nation. NationStates-Z4
    • Divine Cervine is currently researching a cure.
    • People reciting Shakespeare have become a common sight.
    • There has been a rapid increase of noise complaints over the sound of buzzing bees.

October 31st, 2015

    • A zombie apocalypse continues to ravage the nation.
    • Divine Cervine is currently researching a cure.
    • It has been 12 hours since the zombie apocalypse began and the statistics are:
      Survivors: 447,976,970
      Zombies: 452,000,337
      Dead: 6,209,320

    • Children as young as six shock their parents by coming out of the closet.
    • It has been 24 hours since the zombie apocalypse began and the statistics are:

      Survivors: 105,049,210
      Zombies: 381,919,592
      Dead: 417,993,046
      Survival Rate: 11.60%

    • Getting a abortion takes less hassle than writing a letter.

_____

November 1st, 2015

    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Safest. Divine Cervine is ranked 541st in Lazarus and 10,648th in the world for Safest, scoring 627.812 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.
    • It has been 36 hours since the zombie apocalypse began and the final statistics are:
      Survivors: 7,217,680
      Zombies: 169,273,574
      Dead: 735,949,375
      Survival Rate: 0.77%

    • The zombie apocalypse is over.
    • Euthanasia is legal.
    • Retirement homes are often fitted with luxurious suites.

November 2nd, 2015

    • Eminent domain has been abolished.
    • The government is giving peace a chance.

November 3rd, 2015

    • Citizens wishing to leave the country must surrender half their wealth to the government.
    • The breathalyser pledge is a traditional part of marriages in Divine Cervine.

November 4th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Most Dedicated Public Healthcare. Divine Cervine is ranked 400th in Lazarus and 8,815th in the world for Most Dedicated Public Healthcare, scoring 94 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.
    • Wind farms are erected on shuttered oil platforms.
    • Invading armies are given hard glares for their cheek.
    _
    _

November 5th, 2015

    • A ban on unsolicited cold calling in all forms is in effect.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise".

November 6th, 2015

    • An increasing percentage of the population's youth have homosexual parents.
    • Teenagers across the country are celebrating the defeat of a national curfew bill.

November 7th, 2015

    • Businesses are forced to bring all work back within the nation's borders.
    • The national guard is mobilized whenever a mother gets separated from her child at the mall.

November 8th, 2015

    • The government is notorious for leaving citizens with almost nothing from their inheritance.
    • Long arduous trials are held for the most trivial of offences.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise" to "Democratic Socialists".

November 9th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Smartest Citizens. Divine Cervine is ranked 366th in Lazarus for Smartest Citizens, scoring 27 on the Average Edu-tellignceฎ Test Score.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Smartest Citizens. Divine Cervine is ranked 7,514th in the world for Smartest Citizens, scoring 27 on the Average Edu-tellignceฎ Test Score.
    • Students cut up leftover luminous orbs during Arts and Crafts.
    _
    _

November 10th, 2015

    • There is a dearth of space for new houses.
    • Same-sex marriages are increasingly common.

November 11th, 2015

    • Organised sports are frowned upon as frivolous.
    • A well-funded social safety net protects the unfortunate.

November 12th, 2015

    • Organ donation is compulsory.
    • Birth rates have hit an all-time low.

November 13th, 2015

    • Book Publishing facilities are being turned into fairy deer habitats.
    • Anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper.

November 14th, 2015

    • Suburban backyards are seized by the government and turned into national parks.
    • People are now classified as male, female, or genderqueer.

November 15th, 2015

    • Noises louder than a whisper have been prohibited by law.
    • Leather-clad individuals can be seen walking their slaves in public parks.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise".

November 16th, 2015

    • Disgruntled jocks are forced to play tetris for entertainment.

November 17th, 2015

    • Cremation is compulsory for the deceased.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise" to "Democratic Socialists".

November 18th, 2015

    • Sections of the police receive paramilitary training.
    • The mob and the police have recently had numerous clashes in the back alleys of Divine Cervine's cities due to the government's steadfast anti-casino stance.

November 19th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Best Weather. Divine Cervine is ranked 254th in Lazarus for Best Weather, with 108 Metres of Sunlight Above Expected.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Best Weather (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 5,320th in the world for Best Weather, with 108 Metres of Sunlight Above Expected.
    • Immigrant Bigtopians work themselves to the bone to support gold-plated Divine Cervinean pensions.
    _
    _

November 20th, 2015

    • Students cut up leftover luminous orbs during Arts and Crafts.
    • Anyone who so much as frowns is referred to a mental health unit.

November 21st, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Smartest Citizens (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 303rd in Lazarus and 6,443rd in the world for Smartest Citizens, scoring 27 on the Average Edu-tellignceฎ Test Score.
    • The new Refuse Hills housing development is under construction.
    • Children are raised bilingual from an early age.
    _
    _

November 22nd, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Most Cultured. Divine Cervine is ranked 345th in Lazarus for Most Cultured, scoring 43 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Cultured. Divine Cervine is ranked 7,705th in the world for Most Cultured, scoring 43 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.
    • Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity. #303
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise".
    • Students are known to arrive at school in their pyjamas.
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November 23rd, 2015

    • Citizens applying for their first jobs face fierce competition from the homeless.
    • Shelters struggle to keep up with the endless intake of stray animals. #431
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise" to "Democratic Socialists".

November 24th, 2015

    • Dog breeding has been banned in accordance with recent animal experimentation laws.
    • The installation of street lights across remote goat tracks has left citizens bemused.

November 25th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Nudest. Divine Cervine is ranked 429th in Lazarus and 11,624th in the world for Nudest, with 216 Cheeks per Square Mile.
    • Artists are pillars of society.
    • The government pours millions of luminous orbs into rehabilitation programs annually.

November 26th, 2015

    • Heavy industry must go to expensive lengths to dispose of waste.

November 27th, 2015

    • The government is using tax revenues to provide jobs for the poor.

November 28th, 2015

    • The nation is experiencing a severe shortage of sporting events.
    • Mothers are routinely abandoning their children in the name of women's rights.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise".

November 29th, 2015

    • Divine Cervine's soft-touch approach to diplomacy has made it known as the 'push-over' of the region.
    • The nation is currently revamping its entire education system.

November 30th, 2015

    • National parks have long lines of different gender-specific 'Porta-Pottys'.
    • People reciting Shakespeare have become a common sight.

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December 1st, 2015

    • Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity. #303
    • The arms industry has been shut down in a surge of pacifism.

December 2nd, 2015

    • Most citizens in Divine Cervine are abject pyrophobes after extremely graphic pamphlets were mailed nationwide by the government.
    • There is a dearth of space for new houses.

December 3rd, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Longest Average Lifespans. Divine Cervine is ranked 248th in Lazarus for Longest Average Lifespans, scoring 37 on the Enoch Index.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Longest Average Lifespans (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 5,404th in the world for Longest Average Lifespans, scoring 37 on the Enoch Index.
    • Nude art is becoming wildly popular.
    • There has been a rapid increase of noise complaints over the sound of buzzing bees.
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December 4th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 81st in Lazarus and 4,126th in the world for Most Income Equality, scoring 189 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.
    • Droves of former desperados are applying to join the border police.
    • Crowds of flag-burning protesters tend to accidentally become crowds of burning protesters.
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December 5th, 2015

    • Workers have seized control of the economy.
    • The words 'private' and 'enterprise' must never appear in the same sentence.

December 6th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Cultured (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 281st in Lazarus and 6,282nd in the world for Most Cultured, scoring 51 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.
    • Illegal hunting is rife after veganism was recently made compulsory.
    • The nation leads Lazarus in per capita stalking.
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise" to "Democratic Socialists".
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December 7th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Pacifist (last census: Top 5%). Divine Cervine is ranked 59th in Lazarus and 1,353rd in the world for Most Pacifist, scoring 856 on the Lennon-Springsteen Scale.
    • Anti-government web sites are springing up.
    • Teenagers performing appendectomies on their friends has become a popular schoolyard prank.
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December 8th, 2015

    • All forms of advertising are banned.
    • Government-run screening operations remove embryos with severe genetic disorders.

December 9th, 2015

    • Mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest growing field.
    • Drills and shovels have been banned as the government cracks down on any means of fracking.

December 10th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Happiest Citizens (last census: Top 10%). Divine Cervine is ranked 197th in Lazarus and 4,666th in the world for Happiest Citizens, scoring 11 on the Relative Cheerfulness Rating.
    • Reporters often lose their jobs over fact-checking errors.
    • Divine Cervine changed its national demonym to "Divine Fawn".
    • Divine Cervine changed its national demonym plural to "Divine Deerlings".
    • Divine Cervine changed its national animal to "purple fairy deer".
    • The nation is known as the cheapskates of Lazarus. #469

December 11th, 2015

    • Pro-democracy regime change has been avoided. #359
    • The "Underwear of Women in Power" issue of The The Enchanted Wildwood of Sacred Fauna Times is sold out. #275

December 12th, 2015

    • Businesses are forced to bring all work back within the nation's borders. #305
    • People faint regularly as they get stuck with compulsory vaccinations. #092

December 13th, 2015

    • UFO sightings are listed daily in the morning news. #081
    • Purple fairy deer is one of the most popular forenames in Divine Cervine. #258

December 14th, 2015

    • Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity. #303
    • Betting pennies on games of Go Fish is considered deviant. #371

December 15th, 2015

    • Citizens are expected to be proficient in at least five languages. #115
    • Refugees from other nations are flocking to Divine Cervine's border. #047

December 16th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 154th in Lazarus and 3,802nd in the world for Happiest Citizens, scoring 11 on the Relative Cheerfulness Rating.
    • Shelters struggle to keep up with the endless intake of stray animals. #431
    • Parents live in fear of governmental 'child protection' squads. #148
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December 17th, 2015

    • The newspaper industry is subsidised by the government in order to keep it afloat. #269
    • Phone taps are frequently carried out by the police. #150

December 18th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 227th in Lazarus and 4,650th in the world for Best Weather, with 121 Metres of Sunlight Above Expected.
    • Tax-payers are funding ever more extravagant movie projects. #440
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December 19th, 2015

    • Photographers have to apply for a license to photograph Queen Arbeaone. #277
    • The nation has an international reputation for compassion. #036

December 20th, 2015

    • A government program is underway to revitalize Divine Cervine's beaches. #031
    • The new national mascot has to be wheeled onto the field of play. #385

December 21st, 2015

    • High-income earners pay a 100% tax rate. #018

December 22nd, 2015

    • Political dissidents are cut off from essential services. #466
    • Abortions are routinely performed in Divine Cervine's hospitals. #136

December 23rd, 2015

    • Breast milk is being redistributed from each according to their ability to each according to their need. #446
    • Most of the nation's wealthy aristocrats are dentists. #167

December 24th, 2015

    • Children are brainwashed at a young age to accept "Love and peace!" as a way of life. #190
    • Divine Cervine has one of the largest offshore wind farms in the world. #263

December 25th, 2015


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 186th in Lazarus and 4,362nd in the world for Happiest Citizens, scoring 11 on the Relative Cheerfulness Rating.
    • Eminent domain has been abolished. #216
    • The nation is experiencing a severe shortage of sporting events. #045
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December 26th, 2015

    • Pharmacies close down as medicinal drugs are sold freely by the government. #107
    • Organ donation is compulsory. #026

December 27th, 2015

    • Welfare funding has recently gone through the roof. #164
    • Divine Cervine's children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region. #013

December 28th, 2015

    • Companies struggle to cover for the hordes of employees on parental leave. #304
    • The wearing and manufacture of fur apparel is banned. #145

December 29th, 2015

    • Postmen have been arrested in job lots for selling junk mail as home insulation. #210

December 30th, 2015

    • Leather-clad individuals can be seen walking their slaves in public parks. #050
    • Anti-government web sites are springing up. #037
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise".

December 31st, 2015


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