by Max Barry

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The Benevolent Queendom of
Democratic Socialists

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

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The Benevolent Queendom of Divine Cervine History - 2016 January - February

The Benevolent Queendom of Divine Cervine History
2016

January - February

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January 1st, 2016

    • Elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume. #042
    • Tourists from around the world come to visit the country's famous rainforests. #023

January 2nd, 2016

    • The space program has been scrapped in order to focus on more terrestrial pursuits. #053

January 3rd, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 208th in Lazarus and 4,653rd in the world for Healthiest Citizens, with 14 Standard Bananas Ingested per capita per day.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Healthiest Citizens (last census: Top 10%).
    • Mathematicians are hated by children across the country. #474
    • Students are wary of colorfully decorated new teachers with names like Professor Pipsqueak. #276
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January 4th, 2016

    • Genetic researchers have been expelled. #025
    • Any citizen who cries is immediately assigned a psychiatrist. #394

January 5th, 2016

    • Mothers are routinely abandoning their children in the name of women's rights. #268
    • Public intoxication has decreased ever since fraternities were banned. #434

January 6th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 205th in Lazarus and 4,778th in the world for Most Dedicated Public Healthcare, scoring 130 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Dedicated Public Healthcare (last census: Top 10%).
    • A well-funded social safety net protects the unfortunate. #024
    • Divine Cervine is notorious for its citizens' infidelity. #175
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January 7th, 2016

    • All major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras. #021
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Scandinavian Liberal Paradise" to "Democratic Socialists".
    • Dog breeding has been banned in accordance with recent animal experimentation laws. #162

January 8th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 323rd in Lazarus and 7,139th in the world for Largest Public Sector, scoring 34 on the Bureaucratic Comprehensiveness Rating Scale Index.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Largest Public Sector.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Public Sector.
    • Students are wary of colorfully decorated new teachers with names like Professor Pipsqueak. #276
    • There has been a series of riots between local cannibals and health food advocates. #088
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January 9th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 191st in Lazarus and 4,106th in the world for Best Weather, with 131 Metres of Sunlight Above Expected.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Best Weather (last census: Top 10%).
    • There's a shortage of swinging hot spots as land development grinds to a halt. #138
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January 10th, 2016

    • Politicians constantly ring their voters to remind them how good a job they're doing. #289
    • The government is ignoring the latest terrorist atrocities in The Enchanted Wildwood of Sacred Fauna for fear of causing a fuss. #423

January 11th, 2016

    • Pro-democracy regime change has been avoided. #359
    • Consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed. #353

January 12th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 53rd in Lazarus and 1,215th in the world for Most Compassionate Citizens, scoring 154 on the Kitten Softness Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Compassionate Citizens (last census: Top 5%).
    • Anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper. #207
    • Prenuptial contracts have replaced diamond rings in marriage proposals. #336
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January 13th, 2016

    • The government seeks peaceful forum with terrorists. #222
    • Anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper. #207 - I had this issue yesterday as well
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Democratic Socialists" to "Liberal Democratic Socialists".

January 14th, 2016

    • Military funding has been stripped back. #014
    • Military funding has been stripped back. #014 ... Twice in a row on the same day?

January 15th, 2016

    • Suburban backyards are seized by the government and turned into national parks. #457

January 16th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 338th in Lazarus and 7,215th in the world for Safest, scoring 787.899 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Safest.
    • The government awards prizes to television shows featuring stereotype-breaking minority roles. #029
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January 17th, 2016

    • Phone taps are frequently carried out by the police. #150

January 18th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 232nd in Lazarus and 4,994th in the world for Smartest Citizens, scoring 28 on the Average Edu-tellignceฎ Test Score.
    • The upper class have been throwing riots after hunting was recently banned. #169
    • The mob and the police have recently had numerous clashes in the back alleys of Divine Cervine's cities due to the government's steadfast anti-casino stance. #108
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January 19th, 2016

    • Euthanasia is legal. #028
    • Every citizen must submit to DNA testing to be eliminated from police inquiries. #212

January 20th, 2016

    • The nation's official head of religious affairs is an atheist. #006
    • The government's official stance on religion is that it is so very silly. #243
    • Birth rates have hit an all-time low. #364

January 21st, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 43rd in Lazarus and 994th in the world for Most Pacifist, scoring 1,045 on the Lennon-Springsteen Scale.
    • Citizens can be frequently spotted going about their business stark naked. #008
    • Schools have extensive counseling programs for troubled students. #062
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January 22nd, 2016

    • Crowds of flag-burning protesters tend to accidentally become crowds of burning protesters. #087
    • The government is promoting multicultural values with the new 'Just Be Nice, OK?' initiative. #262

January 23rd, 2016

    • Book Publishing facilities are being turned into purple fairy deer habitats. #459
    • The new Refuse Hills housing development is under construction. #342

January 24th, 2016

    • Politicians are often found scavenging bins at night to supplement their income. #307

January 25th, 2016

    • The Divine Cervinean Arts Council pays teenagers to sit through opera performances. #478
    • Anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper. #207 again?

January 26th, 2016

    • It is illegal to make racist remarks in public. #022
    • Divine Cervine was reclassified from "Liberal Democratic Socialists" to "Democratic Socialists".

January 27th, 2016

    • Tax evaders are regularly visited by agents of the Divine Cervine Blood Tithe. #260
    • All forms of advertising are banned. #104

January 28th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 124th in Lazarus and 2,850th in the world for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 183 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Most Eco-Friendly Governments (last census: Top 10%).
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Eco-Friendly Governments (last census: Top 10%).
    • Invading armies are given hard glares for their cheek. #244
    • Most citizens in Divine Cervine are abject pyrophobes after extremely graphic pamphlets were mailed nationwide by the government. #247

January 29th, 2016

    • Illegal hunting is rife after veganism was recently made compulsory. #205
    • Welfare funding has recently gone through the roof. #164

January 30th, 2016

    • Space shuttles regularly launch rubbish into space. #097

January 31st, 2016

    • Citizens are allowed to rise or fall based on their own merits. #061
    • Workers have seized control of the economy. #339

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February 1st, 2016

    • Divine Cervine has one of the largest offshore wind farms in the world. #263
    • All major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras. #021

February 2nd, 2016

    • The government is allowing greater autonomy for some regions in the hopes of quelling growing secessionist movements. #466
    • Pro-democracy regime change has been avoided. #359

February 3rd, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 45th in Lazarus and 1,408th in the world for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 212 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Welfare Programs (last census: Top 5%).
    • Students are known to arrive at school in their pyjamas. #121
    • The government is giving peace a chance. #312
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February 4th, 2016

    • The words 'private' and 'enterprise' must never appear in the same sentence. #152
    • Being impolite in public is punishable by heavy fines. #464

February 5th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 128th in Lazarus and 3,070th in the world for Longest Average Lifespans, scoring 44 on the Enoch Index.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the region for Longest Average Lifespans (last census: Top 10%).
    • Divine Cervine's free colleges struggle to maintain standards in the face of overwhelming demand. #093
    • Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity. #303
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February 6th, 2016

    • An increasing percentage of the population's youth have homosexual parents. #218

February 7th, 2016

    • Citizens can be frequently spotted going about their business stark naked. #008
    • Book Publishing facilities are being turned into purple fairy deer habitats. #459

February 8th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 41st in Lazarus and 1,314th in the world for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 219 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the region for Largest Welfare Programs (last census: Top 5%).
    • Extraordinary tribunals try accused financial criminals. #410
    • The government is ignoring the latest terrorist atrocities in The Enchanted Wildwood of Sacred Fauna for fear of causing a fuss. #423
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February 9th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 297th in Lazarus and 5,848th in the world for Lowest Crime Rates, scoring 269.867 on the Relative Freedom From Crime Index.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Lowest Crime Rates.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Lowest Crime Rates.
    • Suburban backyards are seized by the government and turned into national parks. #457
    • Public footpaths are being slowly eroded by the burgeoning number of ramblers. #195

February 10th, 2016

    • Refugees from other nations are flocking to Divine Cervine's border. #047
    • Foreign 'investors' have been taking a great interest in the new secret shuttle. #361

February 11th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 296th in Lazarus and 6,125th in the world for Safest, scoring 879.452 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Safest (last census: Top 10%).
    • People take government jobs for the frequent flier miles. #278
    • The arms industry has been shut down in a surge of pacifism. #137
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February 12th, 2016

    • Birth rates have hit an all-time low. #364
    • Badminton was recently banned due to 'unacceptable violence' inherent to the game. #239

February 13th, 2016

    • A ban on unsolicited cold calling in all forms is in effect. #112
    • All beauty contests have been banned. #101

February 14th, 2016

    • The state believes that nature-oriented summer camps will somehow solve youth crime. #109
    • The nation is ravaged by daily union strikes. #016

February 15th, 2016

    • Super Barry Brothers is the most popular video game in the nation. #485
    • Protests are legal but strictly supervised. #153

February 16th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 236th in Lazarus and 5,272nd in the world for Highest Average Tax Rates, scoring 20 on the Inverse Hayek Index.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Highest Average Tax Rates.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Average Tax Rates (last census: Top 10%).
    • Tax-payers are funding ever more extravagant movie projects. #440
    • All recreational drugs are legal. #019

February 17th, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 60th in Lazarus and 1,441st in the world for Most Inclusive, scoring 332 on the Mandela-Wollstonecraft Non-Discrimination Index.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Inclusive (last census: Top 5%).
    • Shelters struggle to keep up with the endless intake of stray animals. #431
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February 18th, 2016

    • The nation has opened its arms to an influx of refugees. #035
    • The Divine Cervinean Babysitters Club has proven to be a huge relief to stressed-out parents across the nation. #448

February 19th, 2016

    • Students are wary of colorfully decorated new teachers with names like Professor Pipsqueak. #276
    • The nation is experiencing a severe shortage of sporting events. #045

February 20th, 2016

    • Divine Cervine is ranked 532nd in Lazarus and 11,451st in the world for Largest Public Transport Department, scoring 66 on the Societal Mobility Rating.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Public Transport Department.
    • The government is notorious for leaving citizens with almost nothing from their inheritance. #161
    • The nation has welcomed its expats back with open arms. #226

February 21st, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 40th in Lazarus and 898th in the world for Most Pacifist, scoring 1,114 on the Lennon-Springsteen Scale.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the region for Most Pacifist (last census: Top 5%).
    • Anti-government political posters adorn every building like wallpaper. #207
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February 22nd, 2016


    • Divine Cervine is ranked 283rd in Lazarus and 5,666th in the world for Lowest Crime Rates, scoring 272.85 on the Relative Freedom From Crime Index.
    • The nation has an international reputation for compassion. #036
    • Retirement homes are often fitted with luxurious suites. #122
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February 23rd, 2016

    • Planespotters are emigrating in droves. #379
    • Pharmacies close down as medicinal drugs are sold freely by the government. #107

February 24th, 2016

    • Aeroplanes have been converted into housing units after all air travel was outlawed. #248
    • Same-sex marriages are increasingly common. #001

February 25th, 2016

    • Betting pennies on games of Go Fish is considered deviant. #371
    • Drills and shovels have been banned as the government cracks down on any means of fracking. #449

February 26th, 2016

    • The new national mascot has to be wheeled onto the field of play. #385
    • Space shuttles regularly launch rubbish into space. #097

February 27th, 2016

    • Elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume. #042
    • The government is promoting multicultural values with the new 'Just Be Nice, OK?' initiative. #262

February 28th, 2016

    • The government has begun selling heroin and ecstasy to help fund its projects. #284
    • Divine Cervine gained the banner Icy Gaze by addressing 250 issues.
    • Divine Cervine gained the banner Immortal by addressing 300 issues.
    • Divine Cervine gained the banner The Sun Always Rises by exhibiting low unemployment.
    • Divine Cervine gained the banner Retirement by extending the nation's citizens' average lifespan beyond 80 years.

February 29th, 2016












    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Inclusive.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Compassionate Citizens.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Pacifist.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Nicest Citizens.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Income Equality.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Beautiful Environments.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Eco-Friendly Governments.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Lowest Crime Rates.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Longest Average Lifespans.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Cultured.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Governments.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Welfare Programs.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Healthiest Citizens.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Smartest Citizens.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Cheerful Citizens.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Popular Tourist Destinations.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Best Weather.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Average Tax Rates.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Safest.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Rebellious Youth.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Highest Foreign Aid Spending.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Advanced Public Education.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Nudest.
    • Divine Cervine was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Secular.
    • Libraries are now installed with jacuzzis and mini-bars. #099
    • Businesses are forced to bring all work back within the nation's borders. #305
    • Citizens wishing to leave the country must surrender half their wealth to the government. #283
    • Divine Cervine published "The Benevolent Queendom of Divine Cervine History - 2016 March - April" (Factbook: History).
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