by Max Barry

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Rudest Citizens: 3rdLargest Retail Industry: 4thMost Avoided: 6th
The Walled Cities of
Capitalist Paradise
בתחבולות תעשה לך מלחמה‎
Influence
Minnow
Civil Rights
Excellent
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Excellent

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

EretzIsrael

Population19.991 billion

Capitalיְרוּשָׁלַיִם
LeaderBenjamin Satanyahu
FaithSatanism

Currencyשקל
Animalgazelle

The Walled Cities of EretzIsrael is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Benjamin Satanyahu with an even hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, barren, inhospitable landscape, and enslaved workforce. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 19.991 billion EretzIsraelians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, although Defense is also considered important, while Environment and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of יְרוּשָׁלַיִם. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient EretzIsraelian economy, worth an astonishing 15,220 trillion שקלs a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 761,378 שקלs, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 7,102,292 per year while the poor average 7,219, a ratio of 983 to 1.

Drill sergeants yell in the ears of bespectacled nerds in cybermilitary "reboot camps", the morbidly obese often sell stock options on their own corpses, the government is accused of being heartless by those considered brainless, and people are often woken up by rubbish music. Crime is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. EretzIsrael's national animal is the gazelle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Satanism.

EretzIsrael is ranked 8,336th in the world and 335th in The North Pacific for Largest Black Market, with 152 trillion Standard Monetary Units.

Top
1%
Rudest Citizens: 3rdLargest Retail Industry: 4thMost Avoided: 6thFattest Citizens: 7thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 8thMost Corrupt Governments: 8thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 13thLargest Gambling Industry: 14thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 15thMost Secular: 16thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 18thHighest Disposable Incomes: 26thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 27thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 34thLargest Insurance Industry: 34thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 41stGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 52ndHighest Average Incomes: 55thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 61stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 67thMost Armed: 73rdLargest Mining Sector: 75thMost Efficient Economies: 80thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 84thHighest Crime Rates: 85thMost Scientifically Advanced: 86thLargest Agricultural Sector: 169thHighest Economic Output: 172ndLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 205thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 685thLargest Information Technology Sector: 902ndMost Pro-Market: 2,171stTop
5%
Most Stationary: 3,515thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 3,548thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 4,450thLargest Governments: 4,761stMost Valuable International Artwork: 5,409thMost Subsidized Industry: 6,149thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 6,423rdLargest Populations: 7,320thLargest Black Market: 8,336thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 11,413thMost Influential: 11,780thTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 12,457thSmartest Citizens: 13,665thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 18,447th
Top
1%
Largest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 3rd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 4th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 4th in the regionMost Armed: 4th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 5th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 5th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 5th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 8th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 21st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 34th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 57th in the regionMost Stationary: 80th in the regionTop
5%
Largest Populations: 104th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 190th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 192nd in the regionLargest Governments: 250th in the regionLargest Black Market: 335th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 359th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 373rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 412th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 490th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 624th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 702nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 728th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, people are often woken up by rubbish music.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, the government is accused of being heartless by those considered brainless.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, the morbidly obese often sell stock options on their own corpses.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, drill sergeants yell in the ears of bespectacled nerds in cybermilitary "reboot camps".
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, the nation is in perpetual campaign mode.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, it's always rabbit season.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, throwing garbage out of your house's front window makes it legally someone else's problem.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, tourist operators promise visitors tours of live burning shipwrecks and plane crash sites.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, town nameplates frequently raise giggles from passing tourists.
  • : Following new legislation in EretzIsrael, murder rates are on the rise as the popularity of soylent products grows.

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