The Colony of Gardens of New England is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Miss Lavender with an even hand, and renowned for its closed borders, frequent executions, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate population of 7.672 billion New Englandians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The medium-sized, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rose City. The average income tax rate is 36.1%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but sluggish New English economy, worth 172 trillion cards a year, is led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Basket Weaving, Pizza Delivery, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 22,419 cards, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Jokes told in elementary school often come back to haunt politicians, calling dibs is an unalienable right, counselors have to sign pledges supporting gay rights before they can speak to any patients, and every week is blindness awareness week. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gardens of New England's national animal is the cards, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Gardens of New England is ranked 104,426^th in the world and 2^nd in Gardens of New England for Lowest Crime Rates, with 65.35 law-abiding acts per hour.