The Storage of GiovanniCards is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Gio the Card Farmer with an iron fist, and renowned for its ban on automobiles, daily referendums, and disturbing lack of elderly people. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.131 billion Card Farmers are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Industry, and Education are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Card Cathedral. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 67.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Card Farmer economy, worth 444 trillion Cards a year, is fairly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Woodchip Exports, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 142,108 Cards, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 469,870 per year while the poor average 32,129, a ratio of 14.6 to 1.

The "boy who cried wolf" policy makes sick people reluctant to call an ambulance, travelers are subject to extensive searches if beet stains are visible on their clothing, business is banging at no-tell motels, and knitters are arrested for carrying needles in their bags. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. GiovanniCards's national animal is the Farmer, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Card Farming.

GiovanniCards is ranked 237,194^th in the world and 619^th in Giovanniland for Most Secular, with 6.49 Atheism Rate.