The Holy Green Hotspots of Kabayong Malibog is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by a part-timer with a fair hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, barren, inhospitable landscape, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 40.526 billion Kabayong Malibogians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is effectively ruled by the Department of Industry, although Education is also considered important, while Environment and Law & Order receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Seksing Seksi City. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Kabayong Malibogian economy, worth an astonishing 18,363 trillion orgasms a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Soda Sales, Automobile Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 453,140 orgasms, with the richest citizens earning 7.2 times as much as the poorest.

Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity, the government is washing its hands of alleged corruption, endangered species face obesity instead of extinction, and t-shirts displaying a photo of a part-timer performing the Full-Monty are selling out. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, probably because of the absence of a police force. Kabayong Malibog's national animal is the pornstar, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Kabayong Malibog is ranked 291,964^th in the world and 11^th in The ProcrastiNations for Safest, scoring 1.19 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.