The Republic of Kelsyth is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Lena with a fair hand, and remarkable for its unlimited-speed roads, state-planned economy, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 3.195 billion Kelsythians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Alnelenora. The average income tax rate is 99.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Kelsythian economy, worth 714 trillion Korunas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 223,501 Korunas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Kelsyth's children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region, homeowners are evicted to make way for new runways, the parliament building has installed a revolving door, and Scoutmasters debate whether luxury log cabins defeat the purpose of camping. Crime is totally unknown. Kelsyth's national animal is the Hippogryph, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Church of Light.

Kelsyth is ranked 9,412^th in the world and 286^th in The East Pacific for Most Secular, with 91.59 Atheism Rate.