by Max Barry

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The Anarchical Communists

Excerpt from an rmb post created by the birbrul on his return

(The broadcast begins and the Birbrul looks very tired, slightly slurring his words, with a few empty bottles of Concentrated Birbseed Extract (birb liquor) on the floor
The Birbrul is seemingly not even at a stand anymore, but rather in a bedraggled couch in his room/office calling for the camera to be turned on, in which it is infact turned on already

"It appears I must have been asleep for a year or two, and now New Birblands is in complete chaos."

The camera turns towards a window, and outside is multiple burning buildings, and rioting in the streets

"I will be working swiftly to fix this issue by attempting to execute all the commies that have made themselves in power, and caused this chaos in the first place by initiating anarchical plans. New Birblands is meant to be a place where children can eat their birbseed without fear of being turned into a turkey sandwich, a place to grow up and be a strong and disciplined individual, not to appear like the doggochars endless valley and the dirts"

the broadcast then ends)


After an assassination attempt on the Birbrul, the people were in chaos, and thought the Birbrul was dead. The Birbrul was instead of being dead, staying in an old apartment in Birblin reflecting his tyrannical life, and wondering if he should continue living with the fear of death and assassination at every step.

Once the people thought he died, there was no-one else good to appear for leader, so they elected the worst person possible to the rank of Birbrul, Comrade Bairb, who swiftly dissolved the entire government for a new policy called "Complete and utter chaos" in which the communists were to kill all the people that had even a shred of liking the Birbrul and/or the things he had done. The communists ofcourse, being the main propellant of the original assassination attempt knew he wasn't dead, and were searching vigorously for him. What resulted was total war in the streets between the fascists and communists, propelling a new fascist leader in which they called "Birbrul #2" vs the communist leader Comrade Bairb.

Comrade Bairb ofcourse, mistakingly thought the Birbrul would be cowering in a bunker like he usually was doing, but in reality Birbrul was far away from any sort of bunkers, and Comrade Bairb didn't take his television control switch, in which he could control the broadcasts on all of Television: His main route of propaganda.