The Commonwealth of Northern Socialist Council Republics is a massive, genial nation, ruled by First Speaker Russ with a fair hand, and renowned for its soft-spoken computers, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 3.306 billion Northerners are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Soundstead. The average income tax rate is 93.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Northern economy, worth 571 trillion Commonwealth kronor a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 172,762 Commonwealth kronor, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Teach an angler how to phish and he can make a living, the breathalyser pledge is a traditional part of marriages in Northern Socialist Council Republics, lines of trenches demarcate the nation's borders, and government statisticians explain census inaccuracies by declaring that "Sith happens". Crime is totally unknown. Northern Socialist Council Republics's national animal is the swan, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Northern Socialist Council Republics is ranked 54,628^th in the world and 1,072^nd in The North Pacific for Most Stationary, with 562.11299441412 days.