The Pirates that protect TSP of Palcania is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Blackbeard with an even hand, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, keen interest in outer space, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 1.133 billion Palcanians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bermuda. The average income tax rate is 24.1%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Palcanian economy, worth 115 trillion Berots a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 101,754 Berots, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Billions of Berots are being blown on orbital weapons development, the nationalised Arms Manufacturing Industry is not interested in making weapons, conspiracy theorists allege Bermuda's new subway map resembles Satanic symbols, and the price of takeaway food quadruples after 6pm. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Palcania's national animal is the Black Bear, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities, and its national religion is Piracy.

Palcania is ranked 161,901^st in the world and 5,155^th in the South Pacific for Greatest Rich-Poor Divides, with 2.24 Rich To Poor Income Ratio.