The RP God n Vizier dubbed Dylan of Staynes is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Lambertus VII with a fair hand, and renowned for its smutty television, national health service, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 8.69 billion Staynes enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sani Bursil. The average income tax rate is 64.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Staynish economy, worth 968 trillion Kiribs a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Basket Weaving, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 111,428 Kiribs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Scenic mountain valleys are flooded with water as damming projects get underway, inheritance tax has recently been abolished, bus ads propagandize causes ranging from sexual revolution to religious pogroms, and foreign spirits are hard to find due to an abundance of "Cletus and Jim Bob's Homemade Staynish Moonshine". Crime is totally unknown. Staynes's national animal is the Auroran Cheetah, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Thaerism.

Staynes is ranked 17,461^st in the world and 533^rd in The East Pacific for Most Popular Tourist Destinations, with 1,437.26 Tourists Per Hour.