The Environmental Protectorate of Steenia is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Cretor Lamjack with a fair hand, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, strictly enforced bedtime, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 35.793 billion Steenians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, socially-minded government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Environment, Education, and Social Policy. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Willowsburg. The income tax rate is 100%.

The enormous but underdeveloped Steenian economy, worth a remarkable 4,897 trillion slapsticks a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Book Publishing industry. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is an impressive 136,822 slapsticks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Prankster scientists legally change their names to silly pseudonyms before major discoveries, giggling teens are asked to put their mouths on rubber dolls, sales of disinfectant wipes have skyrocketed, and sex changes are routinely performed at Steenia's hospitals. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Steenia's national animal is the flying squirrel, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Steenia is ranked 241,507^th in the world and 3^rd in Futaba Aoi for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -50.8 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.