The Republiek of Suid-AAfrika is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Staatspresident Velenkosini Hlabisa with an even hand, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, ubiquitous missile silos, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, devout population of 16.199 billion Afrikaners are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Johannesburg-Pretoria-Cape Town. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 73.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Afrikaner economy, worth a remarkable 3,094 trillion Crypto Gold-Pegged Rand a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is an impressive 191,009 Crypto Gold-Pegged Rand, with the richest citizens earning 6.9 times as much as the poorest.

Business ambassadors offer bong tokes to foreign leaders, wars of expansion are described as "peacekeeping operations", drugs containing the compound "oleum de serpens" are being sold to cancer patients, and politicians spend more time in courtrooms than in Parliament. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Suid-AAfrika's national animal is the Springbok, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Conservative Dutch Reformed Church.

Suid-AAfrika is ranked 17,188^th in the world and 1^st in Christian Nations Union for Lowest Crime Rates, with 92.1 law-abiding acts per hour.