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A day at the pool - an extract from Berguld Sirrim's diary
The diary of Berguld Sirrim covers seven months intermittently from February to September in 1742, before being given up on like most of them are (honestly what does one write in those things? - Ed). Within it are the universal musings of an adolescent, as we know from one entry that Berguld was fourteen years old at the time.Aw man, have ye heard rite (1), ah was dragged to me oncle's fabulous multiflex (2) for the seventeenth time or some such. And well aware I am of yer thinking, that is oh very slightly exaggirrated, but to write with candour (very much appreciated by those tutors ay ay) I think that they really want to waste time at these bathhouses for dullards. Dullards I say! Or at least that was me previous conviction, but och when the true pulsation of love is realised the trees become shiny, or something, or at least that's what them poetisers say (3). Anyway, ah is a little concerned about imparting this but ay ay it is a diary is it not rite yes. There was a lady, aye, a lady that's what she was, and och she smiled and... you know, it was pleasant. She was of greyyt delicacy really I thinkis, or at least in the.. talking.. och it is of not a greyyt matter anyhow, I'm going again on the morrow dullards or no. I had mushrooms at dinner.
(1) A common colloquial phrase at the beginning of any anecdote we think. Also, Berguld can't spell. Probably.
(2) A shortened version of 'Fabulousissimo Multiple-Tiered Flexing and Healing House', a sort of spa/exercise complex that had become very popular among leisured classes in the south west of the island at that time.
(3) We believe Berguld is referring to Dom Gauter, a well-known poet at the turn of the eighteenth century, who both advocated equality of the sexes by promoting thoughtful consideration when it comes to sex as well as holding a great fondness for shiny trees, apparently.
