by Max Barry

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Most Devout: 8thMost Primitive: 44thMost Ignorant Citizens: 45th
The Holy Empire of
Authoritarian Democracy
For god
Influence
Sprat
Civil Rights
Rare
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Some

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Teoceto

Population8.087 billion

FaithTecetamisin

CurrencyKolo
AnimalOwl

The Holy Empire of Teoceto is a colossal, efficient nation, remarkable for its deadly medical pandemics, aversion to nipples, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 8.087 billion Teocetoans are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Administration, and Defense. The average income tax rate is 96.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Teocetoan economy, worth a remarkable 1,553 trillion Koloes a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Tourism, Basket Weaving, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is an impressive 192,132 Koloes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Policy reversals are more often graceful demi-détournés than u-turns, trails to natural wonders are littered with trash from reality film crews, major cities shut down as their local sports team takes to the field every day, and invasive drug testing is now performed at elementary school sports days. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Teoceto's national animal is the Owl, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Tecetamisin.

Teoceto is ranked 205,852nd in the world and 8,034th in The East Pacific for Most Avoided, scoring 0.27 on the Kardashian Reflex Score.

Top
1%
Most Devout: 8thMost Primitive: 44thMost Ignorant Citizens: 45thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 242ndBest Weather: 433rdLargest Black Market: 958thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 972ndMost Corrupt Governments: 1,147thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,258thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,390thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,579thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,933rdTop
5%
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 2,194thMost Cultured: 2,599thLowest Crime Rates: 3,125thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3,170thHighest Average Tax Rates: 3,509thMost Efficient Economies: 4,701stHighest Poor Incomes: 6,628thMost Advanced Public Education: 6,679thLargest Governments: 6,867thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 6,924thHighest Average Incomes: 6,984thMost Advanced Public Transport: 7,563rdHighest Economic Output: 10,220thTop
10%
Most Stationary: 11,534thLargest Welfare Programs: 13,495thMost Influential: 15,627th
Top
1%
Most Devout: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 2nd in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4th in the regionBest Weather: 10th in the regionLargest Black Market: 15th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 20th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 25th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 39th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 41st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 42nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 47th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 60th in the regionMost Cultured: 61st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 77th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 79th in the regionTop
5%
Highest Average Tax Rates: 97th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 105th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 158th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 162nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 163rd in the regionMost Stationary: 174th in the regionLargest Governments: 180th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 186th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 197th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 221st in the regionLargest Populations: 271st in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 390th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 573rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 713th in the regionMost Influential: 801st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Teoceto, invasive drug testing is now performed at elementary school sports days.
  • : Following new legislation in Teoceto, major cities shut down as their local sports team takes to the field every day.
  • : Following new legislation in Teoceto, trails to natural wonders are littered with trash from reality film crews.
  • : Following new legislation in Teoceto, policy reversals are more often graceful demi-détournés than u-turns.
  • : Teoceto was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Economic Output.
  • : Following new legislation in Teoceto, passwords to nuclear codes must now contain upper and lower case characters.
  • : Following new legislation in Teoceto, the entire entry for Teoceto in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the World reads 'mostly harmless'.
  • : Following new legislation in Teoceto, pro-wrestling bouts open with a legal disclaimer insisting that any violence is guaranteed 100% faked.
  • : Following new legislation in Teoceto, the government has declared that too much democracy gets in the way of sensible leadership.
  • : Teoceto was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry.

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