by Max Barry

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Issues Editor
Most Valuable International Artwork: 52ndMost Primitive: 178thMost Ignorant Citizens: 223rd
The Room Johnnie of
Tyranny by Majority
The Eye of Providence
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

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The Marsupial Illuminati

Population8.581 billion

LeaderThe Eye of Providence


The Room Johnnie of The Marsupial Illuminati is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by The Eye of Providence with a fair hand, and notable for its daily referendums, anti-smoking policies, and infamous sell-swords. The hard-nosed, democratic, humorless, devout population of 8.581 billion Marsupials enjoy great social freedoms and frequent elections, where the majority of the populace regularly votes to increase its benefits at the expense of various hapless minorities.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, moralistic, outspoken morass — juggles the competing demands of Defense, Spirituality, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Marsupium. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 76.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Marsupial economy, worth 850 trillion Pouches a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Basket Weaving, Woodchip Exports, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is 99,099 Pouches, with the richest citizens earning 6.8 times as much as the poorest.

Cholera is seen as the holiest of diseases, the nation is a world leader in martyrs per capita, the military is plagued with unethical researchers, and immigrants are told to pull themselves up by their worn-out budget bootstraps. Crime is a major problem, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. The Marsupial Illuminati's national animal is the Marsupial, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Pouchism.

The Marsupial Illuminati is ranked 719th in the world and 1st in Sodom and Gomorrah for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring 11,978.34 on the Hickory Productivity Index.

Most Valuable International Artwork: 52ndMost Primitive: 178thMost Ignorant Citizens: 223rdMost Devout: 316thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 719thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1,579thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,831stLargest Black Market: 1,980thTop
Rudest Citizens: 2,695thMost Corrupt Governments: 2,783rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 3,848thMost Subsidized Industry: 3,893rdMost Avoided: 4,815thNudest: 5,977thHighest Crime Rates: 6,884thMost Conservative: 7,422ndBest Weather: 8,226thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 9,338thTop
Highest Average Tax Rates: 17,376thMost Beautiful Environments: 19,144thMost Efficient Economies: 19,351stHighest Economic Output: 19,848th

National Happenings

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