by Max Barry

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Healthiest Citizens: 3rdLongest Average Lifespans: 4thLargest Governments: 4th
The Fielzão of
New York Times Democracy
Timão Eô!
Influence
Power
Civil Rights
Excellent
Economy
Reasonable
Political Freedom
Excellent

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Timao

Population34.68 billion

CapitalItaquerão
LeaderFofômeno and Marcelinho Carioca and Neto
FaithCoringão

CurrencyFifa Club World Cup
AnimalGavião

The Fielzão of Timao is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Fofômeno and Marcelinho Carioca and Neto with a fair hand, and notable for its infamous sell-swords, national health service, and compulsory vegetarianism. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 34.68 billion Corinthians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Itaquerão. The income tax rate is 100%.

The enormous but inefficient Timaoan economy, worth a remarkable 9,853 trillion Fifa Club World Cups a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry. Average income is an amazing 284,125 Fifa Club World Cups, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Professionals are ready to retire by the time they receive permission to use their credentials, the government's foreign policy statements are less threatening than a World Assembly cease-and-desist letter, people faint regularly as they get stuck with compulsory vaccinations, and the combined alert sound of a nation simultaneously receiving a text message is a common cause of hearing damage. Crime is totally unknown. Timao's national animal is the Gavião, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Coringão.

Timao is ranked 26th in the world and 1st in The Proletariat Coalition for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 12,505.61 on the Clooney Contribution Index.

Top
1%
Healthiest Citizens: 3rdLongest Average Lifespans: 4thLargest Governments: 4thMost Beautiful Environments: 4thHighest Average Tax Rates: 4thSmartest Citizens: 5thMost Advanced Public Education: 5thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 5thBest Weather: 6thMost Pacifist: 7thNicest Citizens: 8thMost Cheerful Citizens: 9thLargest Welfare Programs: 11thMost Compassionate Citizens: 14thMost Advanced Public Transport: 15thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 17thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 20thMost Inclusive: 23rdHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 26thMost Rebellious Youth: 27thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 39thMost Valuable International Artwork: 57thMost Cultured: 64thLowest Crime Rates: 80thLeast Corrupt Governments: 100thMost Scientifically Advanced: 198thMost Stationary: 237thSafest: 366thHighest Economic Output: 465thHighest Poor Incomes: 945thLargest Populations: 1,050thMost Influential: 1,458thTop
5%
Highest Average Incomes: 2,356thLargest Information Technology Sector: 4,009thTop
10%
Most Secular: 12,522ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 13,837thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 14,511thMost Subsidized Industry: 15,668th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Timao, the combined alert sound of a nation simultaneously receiving a text message is a common cause of hearing damage.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, people faint regularly as they get stuck with compulsory vaccinations.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, the government's foreign policy statements are less threatening than a World Assembly cease-and-desist letter.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, professionals are ready to retire by the time they receive permission to use their credentials.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, children are disappointed to learn that cavemen never had a yabba-dabba-doo time riding dinosaurs to work.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, the nation is known abroad mostly for its Parliamentary antics.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, there is an abondance of ackawi and zartschmelzend in every Timaoan grocery store.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, literature classes frequently go on field trips to rock concerts.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, former bars are desperately trying to re-brand themselves as cafés.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, a large-scale revitalization of the education system is underway.

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