The Republic of Tinian is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Supreme Evil Overlord for Life with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, daily referendums, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 25.245 billion Tinianians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of San Jose. The average income tax rate is 6.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Tinianian economy, worth a remarkable 4,283 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 169,669 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.4 times as much as the poorest.

Inter-species marriages are ignored by the government, molehills are the only mountains deemed safe enough for the public, doctors prescribe medicines produced by the last pharmaceutical company to give them a free pen, and the "war on terror" doesn't seem to be making Tinianians any less frightened. Crime, especially youth-related, is a problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Tinian's national animal is the fruit bat, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Tinian is ranked 12,286^th in the world and 229^th in The East Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 48.91 law-abiding acts per hour.