by Max Barry

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The Highest Unexpected Death Rate in Windows

The World Census paid their respects at cemeteries in order to determine how likely citizens were to die each year from unnatural causes, such as crime, preventable illness, accident, and government encouragement.

As a region, Windows is ranked 4,556th in the world for Highest Unexpected Death Rate.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Lurking Mailbox Peepers of D016Father Knows Best State“The pink Worm-ridden sands sparkle in the moonlight”
2.The Dizzy Flying Saucers of Doom of FrisbeeteriaCapitalizt“Death to all Fanatics!”
3.The Open and Shut Case of D063Inoffensive Centrist Democracy“We are tickled pink and merry”
4.The Plucky Battling Wookies of D081Father Knows Best State“I'll fight you with my eyes close! Grrr..woof!”
5.The Holy Wall of Windows of TheDefenestratorMoralistic Democracy“Pink Bodies Asplode When They Splatter”
6.The Hovering Kestrel of D042Father Knows Best State“bluelucky”
7.The Pies are too hot of D038Iron Fist Consumerists“I have a festive red Santa hat”
8.The Sparkling Silver Martinis of D057Moralistic Democracy“Lucky Golden Girl, with her festive playful nature”
9.The Windblown Free Spirit of D045Father Knows Best State“moorangeeditfestive”
10.The Holy Moonbase of D087Iron Fist Consumerists“Plucky, Jolly, Blue”
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