The Free Land of Kalaratri is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Stjepan Filipović with an even hand, and notable for its national health service, soft-spoken computers, and unlimited-speed roads. The compassionate, cheerful population of 11.426 billion Kalaratrianis enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Užupis. The average income tax rate is 98.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Kalaratrianian economy, worth a remarkable 2,682 trillion Kelantanese dinars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Average income is an amazing 234,761 Kelantanese dinars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nation has recently been attributed to the funding of terrorist organisations, cigarettes are dead-cheap, all recreational drugs are legal, and people often get liposuction to reduce their air fares. Crime is totally unknown. Kalaratri's national animal is the Rattenkönig, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Eternalux.

Kalaratri is ranked 9,126^th in the world and 258^th in The East Pacific for Safest, scoring 122.38 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.