The No longer in vacation mode of Kop Wert is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Doyle Akin with an even hand, and renowned for its smutty television, keen interest in outer space, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, hard-working, devout population of 5.492 billion Kop Wertians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wert City. The average income tax rate is 80.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Kop Wertian economy, worth 820 trillion Emerald Quaders a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 149,360 Emerald Quaders, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

The media seems excessively interested in what Doyle Akin is wearing this season, bad punctuation has come to a full stop, the legal system for the political class is completely separate from the one for normal citizens, and cosmopolitan citizens ask what their countries can do for them. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kop Wert's national animal is the cuttlefish, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is The Church Of Birch.

Kop Wert is ranked 26,288^th in the world and 21^st in Cape of Good Hope for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 6,143.06 on the Gilded Widget Scale.