The Federal Republic of Brisketania is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Philip Kabob with an even hand, and renowned for its public floggings, ubiquitous missile silos, and aversion to nipples. The hard-nosed population of 6.03 billion Brisketanians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Meatopia Prime. The average income tax rate is 54.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Brisketanian economy, worth 555 trillion Paws a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Furniture Restoration, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 92,149 Paws, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Only 'organics' are permitted to be citizens, advertisements for jobs in the sciences run in fashion magazines, 100-year-old politicians are now a thing of the past, and hordes of unemployed lumberjacks have resorted to cutting down utility poles to satisfy their cravings. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Brisketania's national animal is the Fox, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Holy Sacrament of the Blue Fox.

Brisketania is ranked 209,569^th in the world and 3,817^th in the South Pacific for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -2.83 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.