The Union of Tioloman is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Spere Helias with an even hand, and renowned for its prohibition of alcohol, anti-smoking policies, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 12.164 billion Tiolomanites enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of San Fernando-Bacolor. The average income tax rate is 82.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Tiolomanese economy, worth a remarkable 1,673 trillion Pesos a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 137,554 Pesos, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The nation is devoted to world peas, for the sake of 'public interest' news programs tell viewers how to home-make Sarin gas bombs, country folk are sent to obligatory boarding schools to learn how to be civilized, and the endangered saltwater humpback Carabao is only seen in captivity programs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Tioloman's national animal is the Carabao, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

Tioloman is ranked 289,394^th in the world and 5,413^th in the South Pacific for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -21.31 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.