The Flagship Loudspeakers of 801 is a mammoth, efficient nation, ruled by Mayor Erin Mendenhall with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, otherworldly petting zoo, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 8.422 billion Salt Lakers are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Salt Lake City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 81.0%.

The frighteningly efficient 801ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,342 trillion Dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 159,349 Dollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 503,643 per year while the poor average 38,493, a ratio of 13.1 to 1.

Anything is permissible when wearing latex gloves, soldiers who shoot themselves in the foot are regarded as heroes, only AIs know why the nation is rapidly increasing its semiconductor stockpile, and faceless corporations are expected to assume parental responsibility over millions of teenagers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. 801's national animal is the Rocky Mountain Elk, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Mormonism.

801 is ranked 122,812^th in the world and 2^nd in Cult of Gio for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 2,698.6 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.