The Colony of Abandonland is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Dwight Schrute with an even hand, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, ritual sacrifices, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 1.058 billion Abandonlandians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Uranium City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Abandonlandian economy, worth 158 trillion Kilograms a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 149,840 Kilograms, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,265,694 per year while the poor average 3,280, a ratio of 385 to 1.

One man's trash is another company's tax break, the law forbids arson, murder, and low-quality cheese, city sidewalks are crowded with overweight people, and people are always able to look each other in the eye. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Abandonland's national animal is the Rattlesnake, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Abandonland is ranked 73,021^st in the world and 20^th in The Global Elite for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 3,308.73 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.