by Max Barry

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Most Secular: 2ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 2ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 4th
The Ongoing State of
Democratic Socialists
We Are A Bush. Move Along.
Influence
Hermit
Founder
Civil Rights
Good
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Good

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Absentia

Population37.659 billion

CapitalThe Middle of Nowhere
Leaderyouse

Currencyerg
Animalcambot

The Ongoing State of Absentia is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by youse with an even hand, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, irreverence towards religion, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 37.659 billion Absentians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The tiny, corrupt government prioritizes Education, although Industry, Administration, and Environment are also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Middle of Nowhere. The average income tax rate is 3.0%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Absentian economy, worth an astonishing 19,854 trillion ergs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Information Technology, Tourism, Book Publishing, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 527,215 ergs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

It is impossible to get any work done as auditors swarm every inch of government factories and mines, social networking sites have discussion groups devoted to planning terrorist attacks, the nation's youth would rather watch paint dry than the news, and solid-gold toilets are Absentian prisons' least expensive furnishings. Crime is totally unknown. Absentia's national animal is the cambot, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Absentia is ranked 199,120th in the world and 1st in CDW Federation for Highest Crime Rates, with 1.71 Crimes Per Hour.

Top
1%
Most Secular: 2ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 2ndLargest Information Technology Sector: 4thSmartest Citizens: 11thHighest Poor Incomes: 64thHighest Economic Output: 76thHighest Disposable Incomes: 100thHealthiest Citizens: 131stMost Developed: 156thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 170thLongest Average Lifespans: 176thLargest Populations: 226thHighest Average Incomes: 231stMost Inclusive: 298thMost Efficient Economies: 317thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 446thMost Rebellious Youth: 451stLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 524thRudest Citizens: 578thLargest Publishing Industry: 617thMost Beautiful Environments: 695thLargest Black Market: 795thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1,117thMost Stationary: 1,194thLargest Governments: 1,291stLargest Retail Industry: 1,372ndLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1,860thMost Valuable International Artwork: 2,041stTop
5%
Largest Mining Sector: 2,093rdMost Advanced Public Education: 2,673rdLargest Soda Pop Sector: 3,343rdSafest: 3,805thMost Subsidized Industry: 4,163rdHighest Wealthy Incomes: 4,341stMost Cultured: 4,405thMost Pacifist: 7,452ndMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 8,137thLowest Crime Rates: 8,621stMost Influential: 8,802ndMost Advanced Public Transport: 9,782ndTop
10%
Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 14,090th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Absentia, solid-gold toilets are Absentian prisons' least expensive furnishings.
  • : Following new legislation in Absentia, the nation's youth would rather watch paint dry than the news.
  • : Absentia voted against the World Assembly Resolution "Commend Wallenburg".
  • : Absentia voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Repeal "Wartime Journalism Protection Act"".
  • : Following new legislation in Absentia, social networking sites have discussion groups devoted to planning terrorist attacks.
  • : Following new legislation in Absentia, it is impossible to get any work done as auditors swarm every inch of government factories and mines.
  • : Following new legislation in Absentia, passionate nomination battles are often as intense as general elections.
  • : Following new legislation in Absentia, Youse's told that love often manifests itself through homicidal four-lettered litanies.
  • : Following new legislation in Absentia, parents seeking custody have to write a five-thousand word analysis of their child's imaginary friend.
  • : Following new legislation in Absentia, the government's economic policy can be summed up as "Abort, Retry, Fail?".

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