The Founding Nation of Assorro is a gargantuan, efficient nation, notable for its parental licensing program, smutty television, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 43.717 billion Assorrotarians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government is primarily concerned with Law & Order, although Industry and Public Transport are also considered important, while Welfare and Social Policy are ignored. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 46.7%.

The powerhouse Assorrotarian economy, worth a remarkable 3,287 trillion Pantomimes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Automobile Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Arms Manufacturing, and Trout Farming. Average income is 75,210 Pantomimes, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 216,411 per year while the poor average 20,767, a ratio of 10.4 to 1.

Assorro's navy has been named the scourge of the seven thousand seas, Red Cross demand for body bags are rising while sutures are decreasing, midnight raids drag couples from their homes in the name of decency, and a spate of enforced closures has left 'Government FM' as the nation's only radio station. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Assorro's national animal is the Garden Gnome, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Assorro is ranked 79,555^th in the world and 16^th in Absolution for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 1,274.35 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.