The Republic of Aziltonia is a colossal, orderly nation, remarkable for its closed borders, public floggings, and soft-spoken computers. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 8.874 billion Aziltonians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 56.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Aziltonian economy, worth 442 trillion dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Trout Farming, and Automobile Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 49,899 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government is continually probing the galaxy in search of alien life, adult magazines are having a sales resurgence as internet anonymity disappears, the "feminist protest" defence is increasingly common for cases of armed robbery, and seven-year-olds debate for weeks on the merits of the Oxford comma. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Aziltonia's national animal is the eagle.

Aziltonia is ranked 252,305^th in the world and 78^th in Keep of Darkness XL for Most Primitive, scoring -158.42 on the Scary Big Number Scale.