The City of Bacolod is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Mayor Greg Gasataya with an even hand, and notable for its smutty television, daily referendums, and frequent executions. The compassionate, devout population of 5.254 billion Bacolodnon are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bacolod City Center. The average income tax rate is 70.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Bacolodnon economy, worth 503 trillion Philippine Pesos a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 95,817 Philippine Pesos, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Young children are learning advanced physics to scientifically disprove the existence of Santa Claus, half-submerged and flooded seaside hotels are technically still next to the beach, legend has it Mayor Greg Gasataya's shower singing echoes through the halls of government, and the official Bacolodnon Phrase Book weighs as much as a small child. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bacolod's national animal is the Philippine Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Roman Catholic.

Bacolod is ranked 318,348^th in the world and 13^th in Negros Occidental for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 21.01 on the Bus Surprisal Index.