The Republic of Big Bustard is a colossal, orderly nation, renowned for its enslaved workforce, state-planned economy, and punitive income tax rates. The cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.267 billion Big Bustardians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. The average income tax rate is 55.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Big Bustardian economy, worth a remarkable 1,051 trillion Pancakeses a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Tourism, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 144,702 Pancakeses, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Young children are learning advanced physics to scientifically disprove the existence of Santa Claus, the question "please would you...?" is usually laden with passive aggression, government officials frown on anything more technologically advanced than an abacus, and it is now illegal for teens to view any sites except Club Kitten and My Little Donkey. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Big Bustard's national animal is the Sea Turtle, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Big Bustard is ranked 22,693^rd in the world and 32^nd in The grimy backyard of Bigej for Lowest Crime Rates, with 87.61 law-abiding acts per hour.