The Most Serene Republic of Bloody Tea is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Earl Grey with an iron fist, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, vat-grown people, and soft-spoken computers. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 2.87 billion Bloody Teans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Count Draculas Castle. The average income tax rate is 89.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Bloody Tean economy, worth 477 trillion Teabags a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 166,265 Teabags, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

The military patrols the streets in search of possible secessionists, convicted crypto-miners are sent to the salt mines, lobotomies haven't been the same after the practice was severed, and foreign leaders' Twitcher accounts are monitored for potential threats to national security. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Bloody Tea's national animal is the British Mosquito, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Bloody Tea is ranked 80,213^th in the world and 7^th in The Great Storm for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 2,690.52 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.