The Cardinal Riverland of Bowlabe is a mammoth, efficient nation, ruled by Primarch Galdabo with an even hand, and notable for its lack of airports, flagrant waste-dumping, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 5.158 billion Bowlians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The relatively small, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Carliberry. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 28.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Bowlian economy, worth 812 trillion Trumpets a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 157,529 Trumpets, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 589,853 per year while the poor average 29,433, a ratio of 20.0 to 1.

Newspapers are running a front-page picture of Primarch Galdabo holding a crowbar and standing over a bloodied stockbroker, one does not simply walk into the tundra, busy commuters no longer hear the cries of "I want some more!" on the nation's streets, and police aim to defeat hatred with love with their "hugs-for-thugs" program. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Bowlabe's national animal is the Turtle, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Christianity.

Bowlabe is ranked 58,311^th in the world and 16^th in Angelic League for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 4,246.05 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.