The Republic of Cabbage Cavern is a massive, orderly nation, renowned for its keen interest in outer space, public floggings, and disturbing lack of elderly people. The cynical, devout population of 2.197 billion Cabbage Cavernians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 71.8%.

The powerhouse Cabbage Cavernian economy, worth 212 trillion stardusts a year, is quite specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Basket Weaving. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 96,623 stardusts, with the richest citizens earning 6.9 times as much as the poorest.

The government is deliberately installing bloatware onto computers, baby dolls thrown in the trash are a leading cause of panic attacks, students and teachers are regularly stopped and searched for symbols of religious affiliation before class, and thieves claim they're simply working for the tax agency. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cabbage Cavern's national animal is the moonlark, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Cabbage Cavern is ranked 197,040^th in the world and 1^st in Cabbage Cavern for Nicest Citizens, with 12 average smiles per day.