The Republic of Cabbage Cavern is a massive, cultured nation, renowned for its disturbing lack of elderly people, keen interest in outer space, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 2.347 billion Cabbage Cavernians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 73.7%.

The powerhouse Cabbage Cavernian economy, worth 221 trillion stardusts a year, is quite specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Basket Weaving, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 94,289 stardusts, with the richest citizens earning 6.3 times as much as the poorest.

Elementary school students are required to master Bach's Chaconne in D before graduation, scrapyards are filled with Leader's face, children who refuse to share their crayons are arrested, and public footpaths are being slowly eroded by the burgeoning number of ramblers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cabbage Cavern's national animal is the moonlark, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Cabbage Cavern is ranked 268,260^th in the world and 1^st in Cabbage Cavern for Least Corrupt Governments, with 81.3 percentage of bribes refused.