The Союз Советских Социалистичес of CCCP is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Владимир Ильич Ленин with an iron fist, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, pith helmet sales, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 20.087 billion ТовариÑs are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Москва. The average income tax rate is 73.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient CCCPian economy, worth a remarkable 2,619 trillion рубльs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Tourism. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 130,388 рубльs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

The military's newest anti-tank strategy is throwing a landmine like a frisbee, flight attendants rip down curtains with revolutionary fervor, the state-controlled media salutes those about to spy, and the combined alert sound of a nation simultaneously receiving a text message is a common cause of hearing damage. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. CCCP's national animal is the медведь, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Коммунизм.

CCCP is ranked 299,021^st in the world and 8^th in Spear Danes for Most Cultured, scoring 46 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.