The Republic of Dustcards is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Dustwind with an iron fist, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, enslaved workforce, and ban on automobiles. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 11.346 billion Dustwindians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Industry, and Administration. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 74.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Dustcardsian economy, worth a remarkable 1,974 trillion dusts a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Basket Weaving, and Retail. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 174,012 dusts, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 886,406 per year while the poor average 18,853, a ratio of 47.0 to 1.

Bags of fertiliser come with detailed instructions for not making explosives, the finest dining experience in Dustcards is chakra-infused grass, Chekhov's guns are killing the entertainment budget, and what's in your genes matters more than what's in your jeans. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Dustcards's national animal is the Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Sufferology.

Dustcards is ranked 1,016^th in the world and 11^th in 10000 Islands for Most Primitive, scoring 253.32 on the Scary Big Number Scale.