The Armed Republic of Eligible Unhandsomeness is a very large, orderly nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 260 million Eligible Unhandsomenessians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 15.7%.

The Eligible Unhandsomenessian economy, worth 13.7 trillion dollars a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Door-to-door Insurance Sales industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Basket Weaving, and Book Publishing. Average income is 52,837 dollars, with the richest citizens earning 7.4 times as much as the poorest.

Government police forces protect public schools from the threat of protest, prisoners can't do number twos without their "toilet buddy" present, homeless people can be found sleeping on streets in front of unoccupied second homes, and formerly fertile fields are being leached dry of nutrients by intensive farming. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Eligible Unhandsomeness's national animal is the mouse, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Eligible Unhandsomeness is ranked 106,954^th in the world and 13^th in Deadeye Deepfake Simulacrum for Most Advanced Law Enforcement, scoring 2,433.2 on the Orwell Orderliness Index.