The Holy Byzantine Empire of Eskvor is a titanic, orderly nation, ruled by Vandad Von Charlid with an iron fist, and notable for its state-planned economy, feral children, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 17.622 billion Romanoi are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Education, Administration, and Healthcare also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Miklagard. The average income tax rate is 76.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Roman economy, worth a remarkable 1,997 trillion Dinars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 113,340 Dinars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The military claims that their threatening letters are signed with the blood of their enemies, the nation's spies are always on break time, overhead luggage compartments on planes sometimes conceal diminutive intelligence officers, and oddly patriotic flash mobs spontaneously sing the national anthem. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Eskvor's national animal is the Griffin, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Eastern Orthodoxy.

Eskvor is ranked 238,030^th in the world and 82^nd in KAISERREICH for Highest Drug Use, scoring 64.72 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.