by Max Barry

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Highest Drug Use: 1,645thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,970thLargest Publishing Industry: 2,439th
The Panda's Federal Republic of
Anarchy
Knowledge is Power
Influence
Sprat
Communications Officer
Region
Civil Rights
Frightening
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Widely Abused

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Europeia Dispatch Office

Population13.647 billion

CapitalRaging Coolidgetopia
Leadera Panda that wandered into the Capitol

CurrencyDispatch
AnimalJournalist

The Panda's Federal Republic of Europeia Dispatch Office is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by a Panda that wandered into the Capitol with a fair hand, and renowned for its flagrant waste-dumping, keen interest in outer space, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 13.647 billion Dispatchers live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Raging Coolidgetopia. The average income tax rate is 33.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Europeian economy, worth a remarkable 2,365 trillion Dispatches a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Soda Sales. Average income is an impressive 173,324 Dispatches, with the richest citizens earning 5.4 times as much as the poorest.

Barbed wire entanglements and guard towers surround the Raging Coolidgetopia Natural History Museum, fruit market traders let their stock spoil rather than reduce their prices at the day's end, legislators work 24/7 due to an influx of single-issue bills, and the nation's prisons are touted as the best weight loss programs money can't buy. Crime is well under control. Europeia Dispatch Office's national animal is the Journalist, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Europeia Dispatch Office is ranked 32,273rd in the world and 246th in Europeia for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 859.95 on the Clooney Contribution Index.

Top
1%
Highest Drug Use: 1,645thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,970thTop
5%
Largest Publishing Industry: 2,439thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2,590thMost Efficient Economies: 4,102ndLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 4,232ndMost Rebellious Youth: 4,745thHighest Disposable Incomes: 4,748thMost Stationary: 5,021stHighest Economic Output: 6,136thMost Cultured: 6,184thMost Cheerful Citizens: 6,718thMost Subsidized Industry: 6,803rdSmartest Citizens: 8,032ndNudest: 9,317thHighest Average Incomes: 9,407thLargest Gambling Industry: 9,489thMost Influential: 10,484thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 11,104thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 11,326thTop
10%
Fattest Citizens: 12,085thMost Developed: 13,991stMost Extensive Civil Rights: 14,576thMost Politically Free: 15,158thMost Scientifically Advanced: 15,227thMost Advanced Public Education: 16,594thLargest Populations: 17,084thLargest Information Technology Sector: 17,476thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 17,581stLargest Insurance Industry: 21,510thHighest Poor Incomes: 21,783rdMost Inclusive: 22,285th
Top
1%
Highest Drug Use: 4th in the regionMost Politically Free: 8th in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 9th in the regionTop
5%
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 13th in the regionMost Stationary: 14th in the regionMost Extreme: 19th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 21st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 22nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 30th in the regionNudest: 31st in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 32nd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 37th in the regionFattest Citizens: 41st in the regionTop
10%
Most Efficient Economies: 49th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 52nd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 54th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 55th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 57th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 59th in the regionLargest Populations: 66th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 67th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 75th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 78th in the regionMost Armed: 81st in the regionMost Cultured: 84th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 85th in the regionRudest Citizens: 90th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 91st in the region

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