The Republic of Fire-Man Sam is a massive, orderly nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, pith helmet sales, and ritual sacrifices. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 3.423 billion Fire-Man Samians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pontypandy. The average income tax rate is 45.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Fire-Man Samian economy, worth 334 trillion Give A Shouts a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Woodchip Exports, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Automobile Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 97,633 Give A Shouts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Counselors have to sign pledges supporting gay rights before they can speak to any patients, pollution is on the rise along with government approvals of fracking projects, the government has granted that two plus two makes four, and the men in trenchcoats hanging around playgrounds are actually police officers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Fire-Man Sam's national animal is the Hell be There to Help you Out, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Fire-Man Sam is ranked 182,200^th in the world and 276^th in The Funian Puppet Region for Highest Food Quality, scoring 13.14 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.