The Joy of Head Pat is a titanic, genial nation, ruled by Magnus with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, keen interest in outer space, and state-planned economy. The compassionate, democratic population of 12.544 billion Head Patians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The medium-sized, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tizca. The average income tax rate is 52.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Head Patian economy, worth 912 trillion yen a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 72,749 yen, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The Head Pat Enquirer offers weekly cash prizes for 'most blasphemous song, story, or cartoon', trails to natural wonders are littered with trash from reality film crews, citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns, and ghost regiments exist only on paper. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Head Pat's national animal is the dragon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Cult of Tzeentch.

Head Pat is ranked 280,192^nd in the world and 2^nd in The Thousand Sons for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 25.17 on the Bus Surprisal Index.