The Republic of Izern 31 is a colossal, orderly nation, renowned for its disturbing lack of elderly people, compulsory gun ownership, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 3.84 billion Izern 31ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 59.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Izern 31ian economy, worth 505 trillion guilders a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 131,740 guilders, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.1 times as much as the poorest.

Endangered species are effective hostages against the Izern 31ian military, minor parties are virtually absent in Parliament, disadvantaged neighbourhoods have become no-go areas after sundown, and friendly fire incidents usually result in severe burns. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Izern 31's national animal is the dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Izern 31 is ranked 30,258^th in the world and 30^th in Izern for Most Cultured, scoring 79 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.