The Republic of Izern 314 is a mid-sized, genial nation, remarkable for its suspicion of poets. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical population of 62 million Izern 314ians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, moralistic government prioritizes Law & Order, with Healthcare, Defense, and Welfare also on the agenda. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 20.7%.

The strong Izern 314ian economy, worth 2.99 trillion izerns a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Basket Weaving industry, with major contributions from Pizza Delivery, Book Publishing, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 48,216 izerns, with the richest citizens earning 9.8 times as much as the poorest.

Student athletes gaze forlornly at abandoned izernball fields, members of ethnic minorities are more often called "boy" or "girl" than by their actual names, rich people sell their mansions to pay for endless rows of mobile homes, and Leader has no checks and balances after the upper house was abolished. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Izern 314's national animal is the izern.

Izern 314 is ranked 178,489^th in the world and 812^th in Izern for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 317.72 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.