The Republic of Kelondia is a mammoth, safe nation, notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 5.529 billion Kelondians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 46.9%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Kelondian economy, worth 196 trillion lire a year, is quite specialized and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with significant contributions from Basket Weaving, Retail, and Cheese Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 35,504 lire, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

All major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras, the government awards prizes to television shows featuring stereotype-breaking minority roles, the country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, and it is illegal to brush crumbs off your clothing outdoors. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kelondia's national animal is the kangaroo, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Kelondia is ranked 140,217^th in the world and 1^st in The Waters of Lethe for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 2,279.15 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.