The Halaḥa of Kosher is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Rabbi Hillel with an iron fist, and notable for its avant-garde cinema, prohibition of alcohol, and ban on automobiles. The compassionate, cynical, humorless, devout population of 28.816 billion mashgiaḥim are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Yerushalayim. The average income tax rate is 87.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The enormous but inefficient kosher economy, worth a remarkable 1,425 trillion heḥshers a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 49,475 heḥshers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

It's illegal to be caught on tape, the nation has opened its arms to an influx of refugees, army doctors who come under attack defend themselves by using stethoscopes like nunchaku, and odysseying merchant sailors swear that they've heard sirens in the western seas. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kosher's national animal is the kid in its mother's milk, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is kashrut.

Kosher is ranked 320,152^nd in the world and 38^th in Seinfeld for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 20.81 on the Bus Surprisal Index.