The Pandav Rajya of Kuru and Panchala is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Arjun Singh Yadav with an iron fist, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, smutty television, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.837 billion Dvaitadvaitins are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hastinapur. The average income tax rate is 75.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Dvaitadvaitin economy, worth a remarkable 1,356 trillion karshapans a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 173,139 karshapans, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.5 times as much as the poorest.

Citizens are encouraged to show displeasure with politicians by poking them with sharp metal sticks, sales of disinfectant wipes have skyrocketed, ill and injured visitors in Kuru and Panchala have to walk it off until they return home, and forty-year-old men are asked for their ID before watching the latest pony cartoon movies. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kuru and Panchala's national animal is the Kherigarh cow, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Nimbarka Sampradaya.

Kuru and Panchala is ranked 275,964^th in the world and 24^th in Pecan Sandies for Most Primitive, scoring -292.05 on the Scary Big Number Scale.