The Kingdom of Montevelika is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Queen Velijka Petrović with an iron fist, and renowned for its frequent executions, compulsory military service, and public floggings. The cynical, devout population of 1.845 billion Montevelikans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Padgorica. The average income tax rate is 67.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but inefficient Montevelikan economy, worth 66.2 trillion Veljikan Perpers a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Basket Weaving, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 35,859 Veljikan Perpers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Seasonal hay-fever sufferers are attending government drug counselling sessions to get free doughnuts, bicyclists are banned from major roads, pet rocks are sold by the pound, and orthopaedics patients often have a bounce in their step. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Montevelika's national animal is the Golden Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Orthodox ☦︎.

Montevelika is ranked 259,087^th in the world and 19^th in The Belkans for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 27.21 on the Bus Surprisal Index.